Prompt: What is one example of 'small stuff' that you let go recently? Response: I believe that I am a very empathetic person. No matter what happens even if someone said something horrible about me that is not true, I will still see what they could be thinking. So most things don’t push my buttons. However, there are some exceptions. Personally, something that I let go off recently was the idea that everything needed to be perfect. Ever since I was little my expectations were so high that they were almost unrealistic but I have come to the realization that nothing is ever going to be “perfect” and I’m okay with that as long as I tried my best. In Don’t Sweat the Small Stuff the example the author used was a car speeding. I am not of age to drive yet but when my parents are driving and I see someone speeding I always think about what could be going on in their head at the moment. For example, they could be late to a life changing job interview. That’s why I just don’t worry about it. And at some point in our lives we have all had that happen to us so why should we judge someone else for it?
Chapter 2: Make Peace with Imperfection
Prompt: How does your ‘ego’ distract you? Response: My ego and emotions distract me from truly being myself because I constantly compare myself to others. It's an unhealthy habit of mine but sometimes I feel like if I'm not like everyone else then I'm nobody at all if that makes sense. Whether it's style or smarts or hobbies I feel like I need to fit in. When I compare myself to others I also end up bringing myself down or cause myself to feel like I’m not good enough. I tend to compare my success to others because I want to be the best version of myself I can be. So when I see someone else do something well that I’m bad at it causes me to have a low self-esteem and low confidence in myself but I need to remember that my success is still important even if it's not the same as someone else's. At the end of the day, I should be proud of myself instead of putting myself down.
Chapter 3: Let Go of the Idea that Gentle, Relaxed People Can't Be Super Achievers
Prompt: Analyze: "When you have what you want (inner peace), you are less distracted by your wants, needs, desires, and concerns. It’s thus easier to concentrate, focus, achieve your goals, and to give back to others.” Response: When you feel fulfilled and accomplished in your life everything is at peace. Whether that is inner or outer. You won’t feel distracted by your desires because you will have learned that they just aren’t that important to you anymore. Once you reach a certain level of maturity and peace you will come to realize that objects are not what and will not make you happy. It's the memories and people that you surround yourself with that will. Once you realize that you can focus on other things that are more important in life like your goals. It also gives you time to truly think about yourself and how you can help others.
Chapter 4: Be Aware of the Snowball Effect Of Your Thinking
Prompt: Do you notice how your mind and body feel when you're thinking out of control? Response: I can definitely feel a difference in my mind and body when I’m thinking out of control. I tend to get really uptight and anxious. I get painful knots in my back from being so stressed. If I feel nervous, unprepared, or stressed about something like a school project it makes it really hard for me to relax and focus on anything else because I am constantly worrying about that one project. But there is no point in doing this to myself. Whatever it is that I’m worrying about is not worth my mental health and will still be there the next day.
Chapter 5: Develop Your Compassion
Prompt: Can you recall a time when you made something "big" and dramatic when in reality it was "small" and not that big of a deal? Response: One time I made something “big” was when I first got my braces on. I was extremely worried about how I would deal with them. I made a huge deal out of it and stressed over it. I was expecting them to be super painful and annoying but a week or so after I got them on I couldn’t even feel them anymore. I actually kind of liked them. All that stressing over them never did anything and only made me more nervous. I ended up making such a big deal out of something that was really just, nothing.
Chapter 6: Remind Yourself that When You Die, Your "In Basket" Won't Be Empty
Prompt: What does your 'in basket' look like? And will it be there tomorrow... Response: My 'in basket' looks like LOTS of school work. Working on my assignments takes up most of my time. Mostly because I try to get it all done as soon as it is posted. This has it's pros and cons. A pro is that I don't have to worry about getting my homework done later. A con is that I don't have much time to spend with my family and friends. I fear that if I don't get my work done right away I might forget to finish it later, I might have to do it at the last minute, or I might even forget to do it at all. Just looking at these options stresses me out. But as long as I stay focused on my work, it will all get done in the long haul. I just need to remember that it is okay to take a break to spend time with the people I love.
Chapter 7: Don't Interrupt Others or Finish Their Sentences
Prompt: Do you believe that you are a strong listener or could use some work? Response: I believe that most of the time I am a pretty good listener. I enjoy being there for others whether that means listening to their problems or just giving them some helpful advice. However, I’m not perfect. There are some times where everything I need to say just gets balled up in me and I have to get it out. For example, today me and the freshman reps had a zoom to talk about our ideas for Fall Fest. Everyone had really good ideas and then an idea that I loved and I started to get really excited to tell everyone. I randomly just blurted out because I wanted everyone to hear it before I forgot it (which happens a lot). So yes I am a good listener but I like to be heard too.
Chapter 8: Do Something Nice for Someone Else- and Don't Tell Anyone About It
Prompt: Recall a time you have given, did you expect an acknowledgement? Response: A time that I recall when I gave was when I my mom her birthday present. I spent lots of time creating a handmade card. It took me hours and I put a lot of thought into it. When it came time to give it to her I was really nervous she wouldn’t like it. But, when I gave it to her she loved it! She really appreciated and loved. Just seeing her happy made me happy. I honestly wasn’t expecting a big deal of gratitude or anything like that but just seeing how much she cared really made me feel good.
Chapter 9: Let Others Have the Glory
Prompt: Have you experienced someone else 'stomping' on your story (glory)? How did it make you feel? Response: I think that I’m a very understanding person. So whenever someone does something “wrong” I kind of make excuses for them in my head. Like “Oh maybe they didn’t mean it” or “It was probably just an accident”. That’s part of the reason why I don’t really think of another person ‘stomping’ on my glory as unusual. I get where they are coming from. There are some people that need social interaction to stay sane so talking about their accomplishments is kind of a way to reach out to others. I think of it as a way for them to be seen. But also I’ve kind of gotten used to people only talking about themselves. Sometimes when I want to talk about something I’m proud I will over think it. Most of the time I just end up deciding that it’s dumb and no one cares so I never really get the chance to talk about my accomplishments. After seeing first hand what it’s like to be undermined it has shown me who I do and don’t want to be. When you're in the background it gives you a good perspective on the type of person you want to be.
Chapter 10: Learn to Live in the Present Moment
Prompt: What are some ways that you work to stay in the present moment? Response: Missing out in life is one of my biggest fears. That’s why I always try my best to live in the moment. One way I do this by not worrying about the past. What happens happens and there’s nothing you can do about it so why worry about it? However, I’m not perfect and sometimes I do stress about how certain things will affect my future. Most of the time its grades on homework and tests. Sometimes I just need to remind myself that I need to stay in the present-day. Another way that I stay in the present is by spending time with loved ones. I feel I am most genuine and happy when I am with my family and friends. Something else that keeps me in the present is riding my bike. I have recently started going on daily bike rides with my mom. These are a great way for me to relieve stress and get my mind off of things. These are just a couple of ways that try to stay in the moment.
Chapter 11: Imagine that Everyone is Enlightened Except You
Prompt: Think of a time when you were frustrated, now look at it as a moment of being taught…what did you learn? Response: A time that I was frustrated was when I didn’t do well on a test. I’m really hard on myself and so when I feel like I don’t meet my own expectations I feel like I failed. How I did on a past test will affect my score on my next test. After not doing great it doesn’t make me feel confident in myself which makes me doubt each thing that I do causing me to overthink and get questions wrong. However, I have learned that past failures do not define my future. I have a choice to either sulk about my grade or actually do something about it! If I didn’t do well on a test then that just tells me that I need to study harder and focus more in class. All I have to do is put in the work to get a good outcome.
Chapter 12: Let Other be "Right" Most of the Time
Challenge: The next time you are in a discussion/argument, let the other person be right and take notice of the initial feeling that transpires. Response: There have been many instances where I have gotten into a discussion or argument with someone. I am really strong-minded so it’s hard for me to back down but there is a certain point where there is no point in arguing more. Most of the time that I let someone else be right is because of this. The main reason that I argue about being right is well...because I am. I don’t mean opinions but more like facts and information. If I KNOW for a fact that I’m right, I’m not going to let someone else tell me otherwise. I’m going to prove to them how and why I’m right.
Chapter 13: Become More Patient
Prompt: Do you ever have a reflective moment when you realize you are so very small in this vast world and really your ‘drama’ isn’t that big of a deal? Response:I actually do think about this all the time. It’s kinda crazy to think that everyone has their own individual life. Every single person in the world is doing something right now and you have no idea what it is. Even the people that are in your life have their own life and things that you know nothing about. At the end of the day, you are just a small speck in this world. Even though that is true that doesn’t mean that you can’t make the most of it. If you get into ‘drama’ you have got to realize that in a year or two what you are in drama about won’t be important anymore. You probably will have forgotten about it by then.
Chapter 14: Create "Patient Practice Periods"
Prompt: Do you have a ‘Mantra’ , a statement, that you make to yourself daily or weekly? Response: I don’t really have anything specific that I say daily but whenever I’m having a bad day or feel unmotivated I just think “Make today a good day”. It’s all about mindset. If I choose to actually have a good day instead of feeling bad for myself, my day will be much better. If you spend all day feeling sorry for yourself instead of actually doing something about it then you are just wasting your day. I always try to do at least one thing a day that brings me joy. Whether that’s going on a bike ride, walking my dogs, or going shopping. It can be anything that will improve my day.
Chapter 15: Be the First One to Act Loving or Reach Out
Prompt: Have you lost a relationship because something “small” created a “big” divide? Response: I have lost friendships due to something small. Although it was small, it was still a build-up of many things. After certain comments and actions had happened so many times I was just fed up with it. I would say that the “small” thing was just the last straw for me but wasn’t exactly what separated us. It took awhile but we are back to friends just not in the same place that we used to be. We are friends but still a safe distance to where I don’t get hurt if that makes sense.
Chapter 16: Ask Yourself the Question, "Will this Matter a Year from Now?"
Prompt: What do you hope to do a year from now? Response: A year from now I hope to have traveled more. The coronavirus has limited me from doing a lot of things that I enjoy. I hope that by this time next year corona will be gone or at least contained so that everyone can go back to their normal lives. I really miss being able to travel the world and go on new adventures but I understand the precautions. I just hope that it won’t be like this for much longer.
Chapter 17: Surrender to the Fact that Life isn't Fair
Prompt: Is life meant to be fair? What does that even mean? Response: I don’t think that life is meant to be fair. When I think of “fair” I think of everyone getting whatever they want or desires such as a certain job or house but life is much more than that. If life was fair everyone would get what they wanted. When people don’t get what they want they learn how to work harder to achieve their goals. Let’s say we are in a fair world. You interview for a job but someone else who interviews has more experience and expertise. Because life is fair you would both get the job but it’s not like that in the real world. Maybe there is only one position or the business can only afford one person.
Chapter 18: Allow Yourself to Be Bored
Prompt: “Do you ever take the time to be bored?” Response: I don’t take time to be bored because it makes me feel like I’m not truly making the most of my life. A lot of my time is taken up by homework but when I find spare time I like to always be doing something. I feel like when I am just sitting in my room bored it is wasting my time. I need to always be doing something because it makes me feel like I am doing something in my life and being productive. When I’m not, I feel like I am wasting my life because I’m not making any memorable memories.
Chapter 19: Lower Your Tolerance to Stress
Prompt: “Have you been taught to believe high stress is a positive thing? Response: I haven’t been taught to believe high stress is a positive thing but I can understand why someone would think that. When I think of “high stress” I think of deadlines and something always needing to get done. This does not seem like a good way to live. When you are so focused on the future to get things done you don’t pay attention to what is happening in the present. However, I think that when you have lots of stress it tells you that you are actually making an impact on your life and are getting somewhere.
Chapter 20: Once a Week, Write a Heartfelt Letter
Prompt: "When was the last time you sat down and wrote a letter to someone with gratitude?" Response: The last time I wrote a letter to someone with gratitude was when I was apart of the gratitude video during November. In this letter, I wrote to my mom. I’m really grateful for all that she has done for me. Writing this letter made me realize how important it is to show your appreciation for others.
Chapter 21: Imagine Yourself at Your Own Funeral
Prompt: If you could change anything right now about your life, what would it be? Response: If I could change one thing in my life right now I would go out and do things I’ve always wanted to do. I’m grateful that I’ve been fortunate enough to experience lots of things many people haven’t. I have gotten to travel a lot and try many different sports but I feel like sometimes I just go with the flow. I want to go out and live my life. I want to be able to experience those things that only happen once in your lifetime. I’m only a teenager for a short amount of time so I don’t want to be missing out by doing the same thing repetitively everyday. Most of my days consist of going to school, doing homework and then sleeping. I want to go out and experience the world. I know that I’m still young and all but I’m going to do what I can to experience all the world has to offer.
Chapter 22: Repeat to Yourself "Life Isn't an Emergency"
Prompt: Describe a time or moments in your life when you turn something into an emergency. Response: A moment in my life when I turned something into an emergency was cheer. I tend to be really hard on myself and I especially was last year with it being my first time doing something like that. I feel like I sometimes expect things to automatically be perfect and when they’re not I blame myself. Anyways, I was learning a new trick and I was getting it every now and then but it really started to frustrate me. Instead of getting angry I would get in my head and start getting really anxious. That day I went home and calmed down then the next day I realized that it was totally fine that I hadn’t gotten the trick. Most people hadn’t so why was I working myself up. Sometimes the small things really are just small things.
Chapter 23: Experiment with Your Back Burner
Prompt: Analyze: “It puts our quieter, softer, and sometimes most intelligent source of thinking to work for us on issues that we have no immediate answer for.” Response: This quote from the novel explains how your “back burner” will always help you. Personally, I know that I tend to put a lot of things on my back burner. Not only things like assignments and projects but also things like having difficult conversations with people. A lot of the time I try to avoid difficult conversations but convincing myself that I’ll have time to do it later. I think the common saying with back burners would be “It’s okay I’ll do it tomorrow” but after some time all of those things you put off start to add up and it can become extremely stressful and overwhelming. I think I’ve gotten better at keeping things on the front burner by getting them done right away which creates less stress but every now and then I do find ways to keep holding things off until the last minute.
Chapter 24: Spend a Moment Every Day Thinking of Someone to Thank
Prompt: Who is one person you would thank in this moment and why? I challenge you to communicate this gratitude with this person. Response: At this moment, I would like to thank my mom. She’s one of the only people that have been there for me no matter what. She never judges me and always supports me in anything I do. I trust her to tell her anything. She has had a huge impact on my life. Ever since I was little she's been my role model. My mom has taught me so many life lessons growing up that I won’t forget. I try my best to let her know I am grateful for her but even then, she does so much that I think I could definitely do it more often.
Chapter 25: Smile at Strangers, Look into Their Eyes, and Say Hello
Prompt: When you read this chapter, regarding eye contact, what are your initial thoughts? Response: I feel that eye contact is very underestimated in its impact. Small actions can lead to a large effect. Even though most people you pass by are strangers, it’s still very important to show them kindness. It really isn’t that difficult to do one small action to make someone else’s day better. You never know what someone else may be going through so it’s good to know that you may be helping someone. Personally, I try my best to appear approachable although some dirty looks may make it a little difficult. I know that when I see strangers acknowledge me it makes me feel really good about myself so, I hope that I can do that for others.
Chapter 26: Set Aside Quiet Time, Every Day
Prompt: When do you find a quiet moment in your day, everyday, just to be present and quiet? Do you? Or perhaps you don't...explain. Response: Honestly, I find it hard to make time for myself to just be present. Once I wake up I’m usually going all day until my head hits my pillow. I find it hard to be present when I have so many things to do. I tend to be more focused on what I need to get accomplished instead of focusing on myself. Even once I get things done I somehow find something else that I need to add to the list of must-dos.
Chapter 27: Imagine the People in Your Life as Tiny Infants & as 100 Year Old Adults
Prompt: Describe a time when you have been frustrated with someone, but you “let-go” of the situation and moved forward with your life. How did that make you feel? Response: Recently I’ve had to let a lot of things just go because it’s not worth fighting for. Most of the time it’s with friends. I’ve learned that with little things you have to pick your fights because in the end it really isn’t worth fighting over unnecessary things that really won’t matter in even a year. Although it can be difficult, it really is easier to let little things go that don’t matter. I have moved on with my life past things I've let go pretty easily. My thought process is that even though you are moving on that doesn’t necessarily mean you need to forget about it. It just means that you aren’t going to let it consume you.
Chapter 28: Seek First to Understand
Prompt: Describe a situation where you didn't seek to understand first. Was there resolution to this conflict? Response: A situation where I didn’t seek to understand first was when I was being accused of something that I didn’t do. I immediately got angry and didn’t stop and listen to the person accusing me. I felt really hurt and betrayed so I stopped talking to them for a bit until I could cool down. After some time I found out that someone else had been spreading rumors about me and the person that I thought was accusing me was actually just trying to ask me if they were true. Although their delivery could have been better I should have given the person a chance to explain themselves so that the whole situation could have been avoided.
Chapter 29: Become a Better Listener
Prompt: Who is someone that you can genuinely talk to, that you know will listen to you? A person that I know I will always be able to genuinely talk to and will listen to me is my mom. My mom and I have always been close. I tell her about almost everything going on in my life. I trust my mom more than anyone else and I know that she will support me no matter what so it makes me feel open to talk to her. My mom always knows what to say or how to help if I have a problem. No matter where I am I will always go to my mom for help. I’m so grateful for all of the rants she has listened to openly without judging or belittling me.
Chapter 30: Choose your Battles Wisely
Prompt: Describe a time when you "lost you Shhhhh" and in reality it wasn't worth the energy. How did you feel after the confrontation? Could it have gone differently if you didn't sweat the small stuff? Response: A time when I “lost my Shhhhhh” and in reality it wasn’t worth the energy was when I was stressing over a project. No one in my group had done anything and it was due the next morning. I was so mad that they had dumped everything that needed to get done on me. I texted all of them reminding them that the project was due the next day and they just brushed it off showing me that I was going to have to take the lead and do it all. Instead of just getting it over with I started stressing out and just sat in my room for an hour hoping they would help but they didn’t. Eventually I did finish it after many hours but if I hadn’t spent so much time freaking out I could have had it done a lot sooner with less stress on me.
Chapter 31: Become Aware of Your Moods & Don't Allow Yourself to Be Fooled by the Low Ones
Prompt: Explain a time when you were in a bad mood and how it shaped your day. Vise Versa, explain a time when you were in a great mood and discuss the day you had. Response: I feel that mood can have a large impact on our day. The same things could happen to different people in a day and they could both perceive it differently. I think that when you’re in a bad mood everything seems to bother you even if you don’t mean to but in a good mood you tend to look more on the bright side of things. I know that for me anything happening when I’m in a bad mood can just make my day worse. However, when I'm in a good mood I think that I try to be more positive about things like if I don’t get a good grade I just say that’s it’s okay and I can do better next time but if I were in a bad mood I would let that one thing take over my whole day.
Chapter 32: Life is a Test. It is Only a Test.
Prompt: "As an experiment, see if you can apply this idea to something you are forced to deal with" right now. Explain your emotions and logic behind the situation. Can you rise above it? Response: Right now something that I’ve had to deal with is all of the pressures to be successful. Now I’m not sure if I really agree with the idea of “not taking life seriously” in certain cases. One reason is that because if I were to apply this to my school work it would most likely lead me to become lazy and to stop caring about how well I’m doing. Yes this tactic is good for things that are not as important because you can just brush it off and move on with your life but with things that will actually have a long term effect on your life I think that it’s good to still be aware of how your actions have consequences.
Chapter 33: Praise & Blame are All the Same
Prompt: You will not please everyone... how does this statement sit with you and why do we tend to focus on the negative rather than the positive. Response: If you told me this last year, this statement would have probably really upset me but I think that recently I have learned that all of those other people have no meaning in your life so it’s not worth worrying about. At the end of the day there’s always going to be someone that has something against you, even if you were the smartest, funniest, nicest, prettiest person on Earth there would still be people trying to tear you down so I’ve learned to sorta just stop caring. In five years everything that happens now will not even matter at all so I just want to have fun and enjoy my high school years without worrying about anyone else. Along with that, I think that we tend to focus on the negative rather than the positive because most people tend to see that positive as normal. Say it’s a bright sunny day and the weather is perfect. You don’t really think about it because the weather has been really good all week but once it rains the next day it brings down your whole mood and all you do is complain about the poor weather. This leads me to believe that most people take a lot of the positive things in people’s life for granted which leaves them to only notice the negative side of things.
Chapter 34: Practice Random Acts of Kindness
Prompt: Describe a time when you completed a random act of kindness and how did it make you feel. Response: A time that I completed a random act of kindness would be when I smiled a stranger while taking my dogs for a walk. This made me feel really good because they smiled back and I could physically see their spirits boost. Practicing random acts of kindness has been something that I’ve always tried to do because I’ve seen the impact it has had. Even a little thing such as opening the door for someone or giving someone a compliment could be something that makes someone else’s day so much better and you don’t even know. You never really know what someone is going through so I always try to be kind to others in any way that I can be.
Chapter 35: Looking Beyond Behavior
Prompt: In your own words, describe the meaning of Loving-Kindness Response: I view loving-kindness as going out of your way to make sure that someone feels cared about. For many people kindness is considered a small act such as smiling at a stranger or asking how someone is doing but when love is involved I think that the definition grows larger. Love causes people to do something that they wouldn’t typically do for a certain thing or person. When you are showing loving-kindness you are doing or saying something that you feel deeply about because you know that it will positively affect the other person rather than because you are simply just a kind person.
Chapter 36: Seeing the Innocence
Prompt: What occurs when we practice compassion toward others and let go of “their” story, rather than be caught up in the drama of a situation? Response: When we practice compassion toward others and let go of “their” story we have less judgment and criticism towards others. Something that is really important to me is perspective. I caught myself getting upset at someone then realized that if I were them I would have probably done the same thing. Putting myself in other people’s shoes has given me a better understanding of why people do the things that they do. Let's say you're driving to the store and a car speeds and passes you. Instead of getting upset that they cut you off try considering the possibilities. Maybe the driver of the car is running late to an important meeting or there’s a family emergency going on. If that were you would you really be worried about the other cars that you’re? You never truly know what’s going on with someone unless it’s yourself so it’s best to avoid unnecessary drama.
Chapter 37: Choose Being Kind Over Being Right
Prompt: Define equanimity. Do you practice this in your life? Look at your Ego first before you answer… Response: Oxford Languages defines equanimity as “mental calmness, composure, and evenness of temper, especially in a difficult situation”. I believe that I do practice this life because I never really freak out unless I’m extremely overwhelmed. Mentally I could be all over the place but you wouldn’t even know it if you were to just look at me. Before I jump to conclusions and stress out, I find that I am able to stay calm because I immediately come up with a solution to the problem. I don’t like conflict so it’s almost a reflex for me to start thinking of ways to fix a problem. Although for the most part I am calm, when it’s one of those rare instances that I am too stressed I think that I don’t practice equanimity and can become very irritable. If I know that there’s a lot I need to get done, anything that stops me from working on it could upset me, only making things worse. Although this is not very common, when this does happen I think that I should focus on staying calm and taking things step by step.
Chapter 38: In Picking 3 People, Who Would You Choose and Why Them?
Prompt: In picking 3 people, who would you choose and why them? Response: If I were to choose 3 people to tell them I love them today I would choose my mom, sister, and my best friend. Each of these people have been someone that I feel safe going to for help or advice without judgment. They have supported me in everything that I do and never make me feel bad about myself. My mom is someone I especially make sure I know I love her because she has been there for me in times where I felt like I had no one else. She’s my best friend and the person I go to when I need anything. My mom has never let me down and has really shown me what a role model should be like.
Chapter 39: Practice Humility
Prompt: Describe a time when you saw an individual or a group lack humility. How did that make you feel about said individual/group. Response: The time when I saw a group of people lack humility was when I was in New York. The city was huge with many homeless people. Although I understand most people are unable to give much, I believe that it’s common decency for people to at least acknowledge their presence. Those people living their life on the street are human just like the rest of us and deserve to be treated so. Swiftly walking past them, making sure to avoid all engagement with them is cruel and may make them feel as if they are invisible. If it was your friend or family member out on the street you wouldn’t want to see that so why do it to other people.
Chapter 40: When in Doubt About Whose Turn it is to Take Out the Trash, Go Ahead and Take it Out
Prompt: What is your perspective of this article? Valid, or a waste of time? Response: My interpretation of this chapter is about people being the bigger person but also stepping up.Although I do agree that in some cases you should step up and help when needed, I’ve experienced where this help is taken advantage of or expected. Last year I would always work with the same group of people on projects. The first time everyone worked on it a little but a lot of people were busy outside of school and couldn’t finish it so I offered to do it. I noticed that the next time when we worked together they contributed less and put a lot of the load on me.
Chapter 41: Avoid Weatherproofing
Prompt: Do You Weatherproof? Explain. Response: I think that occasionally I may “weatherproof” but for the most part I don’t. I tend to think more optimistically and avoid negative things. When I do weatherproof it’s about myself. Sometimes I overthink the things that I do and the way that I act to be able to see myself from someone else’s perspective. When it comes to relationships I think that I am sometimes weatherproof but it’s more subconscious. I don’t go out of my way to look for weak spots or negative traits with relationships but if someone does something that I don’t agree with I do make a mental note of it.
Chapter 42: Spend a Moment, Every Day, Thinking of Someone to Love
Prompt: Who do you choose to send love to in this moment? Response: In this moment I choose to send love to my mom At this moment I choose to send love to my mom who has had a strong impact on my life. She has had a huge impact on me and my character. Ever since I was little she's been my role model. I did everything that I could to be just like her. I would go to work with her, rummage through her closet, and always offer to go with her to run errands. My mom has taught me so many life lessons growing up that I won’t forget. She taught me to have confidence in myself, be kind to everyone, and that my actions affect others. She has shaped me into the strong person that I am today. My mom is one of the wisest, most caring people that I know. At times where I felt like I had no one, she made sure I knew she was right by my side. I have always looked up to my mom and I hope that when I grow up I can have the impact that she had on me with other people in the world.
Chapter 43: Become an Anthropologist
Prompt: Reflect on the Following: "judging others takes a great deal of energy and, without exception pulls you away from where you want to be." Response: We have all judged each other at some point in our lives whether that be with hurtful or innocent intent. I noticed that hurtful judgment tends to come from those that contain many insecurities and in order to make themselves feel better they project them onto others, criticizing things that they might not be able to control. When you have so much negative energy built up I think that exerting more becomes a habit. I think that innocent judgment happens constantly. For example in every situation we’re in we’re judging it. Perhaps you go to a neighborhood and decide that it doesn’t seem safe so you decide to leave, you are “judging” that neighborhood. The decisions that we make are based on our judgment.
Chapter 44: Understand Separate Realities
Prompt: Why is it important to see the differences amongst one another in our small intimate circle to cultures around the world? Response: It’s important to see the differences amongst one another in our small intimate circle to cultures around the world because it allows you to feel empathy and see things from a different perspective. For many of us we get into arguments over small things with people that we care about simply because we do not have the same views. If we were able to just have an open mind, it would eliminate the disagreements. Seeing differences around the world allows you to build your cultural awareness. This means that you're building your respect and empathy for other people, and celebrating your differences as well as your similarities
Chapter 45: Developing Your Own Helping Rituals
Prompt: What are some ways that you can help the spread of kindness towards others? Response: Something that I am a strong believer in is that small actions have big impacts. The butterfly effect rests on the notion that the world is deeply interconnected, such that one small occurrence can influence a much larger complex system. The effect is named after an allegory for chaos theory; it evokes the idea that a small butterfly flapping its wings could, hypothetically, cause a typhoon proving that small actions can have big impacts. Each day I try my best to spread kindness through small, thoughtful gestures such as smiling at a stranger when I walk past them, asking someone how their day is going, being a listening ear, or giving someone a compliment. You never truly know what is going on in someone else’s life even if you may think that you do so it’s important to treat others in a positive way rather than bringing them down. I’ve had days where it just felt like everything was going wrong but then someone came up to me and saw that I was upset and was asking me about what was wrong. This action may seem simple but it completely changed my day by making me realize that there were people around me that cared about my happiness.
Chapter 46: Every Day, Tell at Least One Person Something You Like, Admire, or Appreciate About Them
Prompt: Give someone a compliment via text message or DM. Who did you choose and how did it make you feel to support another person? Response: I chose to text my mom while she was at work. I told her that I appreciated all of the things that she did for me and the rest of my family. My mom is someone that always puts others before herself and so I think that it’s important I take the time more often to recognize how great of a mom she is. I could tell from my mom’s response that she felt appreciated after my text message which improved my mood and want to also make other people feel appreciated through compliments.
Chapter 47: Argue for Your Limitations, and They’re Your
Prompt: Discuss a time when you had self doubt and set limitations on yourself. How did you or how can you change this behavior? Response: One thing in my life that I’ve struggled with is cheer. Being a flier involves not only physical strength but also mental strength. When I was first starting to learn how to fly in stunts I had no experience and honestly no idea what I was doing. My stunt was constantly falling over and over again and it made me feel like I couldn’t do anything right. Instead of walking away as soon as I was struggling with this, I decided to keep trying. Although I did fall MANY times at first, I slowly began to be more consistent with staying up in the air to the point that eventually, I didn’t fall anymore. I think that this quote can resonate with each and every individual whether it be with sports, academics, or just experiences in life because there will always be challenges. It’s how you react to these challenges that shows your true character. Those that keep going even when things get hard will be the ones that ultimately succeed while those that chose to fall and just never get back up will get left behind.
Chapter 49: Resist the Urge to Criticize
Promt: What is your perspective on one who is critical, talking poorly, about another person, lies to feed the ego? Look inward… are you guilty. I believe that criticism is something that is necessary for everyone to experience throughout their life. It is the Judgment that is needed to help you learn and grow and be able to adapt to the hate that you experience. criticism is a reflection of yourself and your insecurities and is something that is portrayed on to others without realizing. Although criticism is necessary for growth, it can also be bad when constant. Constant criticism can lead to someone breaking down and reaching their limit. At that point you won't be able to get through to them and the criticism has become too much. so I believe that the necessary amount of criticism is useful however when taken to the extreme it can be harmful.
Chapter 50: Write Down Your Five Most Stubborn Positions & See If You Can Soften Them
Prompt: Where do you find stubborness in yourself? Describe in detail. Response: I find stubbornness in myself when I am standing up for something that is important to me. When I stand up for something that matters to me I refuse to back down or settle for anything less than I deserve. Stubbornness can happen in a positive way or a negative way so it is important to take a step back and reflect when you are being stubborn to make sure that it is for the right reasons. While I may not be perfect, I try my very best to always make sure that when I am being stubborn it is because I am standing up for something that matters to me or for something that is right.
Chapter 51: Just for Fun, Agree with Criticism Directed Toward You
Prompt: Describe a time when someone criticized you and discuss the emotions felt behind these comments. What do you think about the author’s idea to accept the criticism? Response:A time when someone criticized me was during cheer. I had just started cheering the year before and wasn't completely confident in my abilities. My coach at the time was very hard on me and expected a lot. One day, I was trying a new skill and wasn't able to get it right because of my flexibility. My coach told me I had looked like a “Dorito” in the air and that the stunt was ugly. Although at the time this criticism upset me due to how harsh it was, it gave me motivation to want to improve. I went home and stretched everyday to perfect the stunt and was eventually able to do it successfully. I think that criticism is something that is necessary for everyone to grow and develop. There’s always room for improvement. Criticism does not always need to be negative, criticism can be used to ignite, drive and determination in a constructive way. I personally have learned to use criticism as a way to motivate myself to be better.
Chapter 52: Search for the Grain of Truth in Other Opinion
Prompt: Describe a moment when someone shared their opinion that you didn’t agree with, but was willing to listen and hear a different perspective. How did the overall conversations go? Response: Response: A moment when someone shared their opinion that I didn't agree with was when one of my friends chose to become friends with someone else that I felt wasn't a genuine person. Although we had differing perspectives, I understand that we are two different people living two different lives. I am allowed to have my own opinions, just as she is allowed to have hers so I'm not going to dictate who she can and cannot surround herself with. We were able to talk about how we felt and we both understood that we felt differently and that was okay. I think it's important to hear different perspectives in order to be able to put yourself in other people's shoes. To be well-rounded you must be able to understand why other people may be feeling a certain way.